My Apologies

My apologies to anyone who follows me on pinterest. I'm sure the floods of running advice, diets, and fitspirational images are getting slightly annoying.

The truth is, my motivation came to a screeching halt mid-January. It was cold. I was feeling fat and useless-a horrid combination. This resulted in too much TV, not enough homework, excessive snacking, and no progress on the scale or with the measuring tape.

Its quite frustrating when you feel like you are putting in adequate effort and nothing is happening. I was going to the gym every morning at 5am...that should be enough, right?

Welp, not so much if you end up binge eating around 4pm and resort to watching Friends re-runs for the rest of the night.

So, I'm trying to recommit myself and put in the effort in other places. 5am workouts don't do much if you eat them away. Trying to get a 4.0 isn't going to happen in front of the TV.

Even if I tread water for the next few months-not making any significant progress...it is still 100% better than watching the scale climb and the grades drop.

Drops of Awesomeness

 My inspiration comes from a post on Daring Young Mom. You can find it here.

The problem with having goals and dreams is that you are forced to look inward and figure out what areas you struggle most in. What a hard thing to do! Then, as soon as you start to attempt to make progress you realize the difficulties you are facing and it is easy to turn into a Negative Nancy-putting yourself down without even realizing it. Our efforts are never enough, our mistakes are too detrimental.

Oh. You just folded the laundry that has been sitting in the dryer for 4 days? Wife of the year!

You're actually saying a sincere prayer....When was the last time this happened?

An 85% on that super easy assignment?! You're never going to get a scholarship at this rate. 

Pasta with Alfredo sauce?!!!? Why even try?

The list goes on, and on.

In the past 2 weeks I have realized that overcoming that inner voice is more challenging than any goal you could set for yourself. It talks you out of workouts and into pasta; out of homework and into Facebook....and then blames you.

I don't think that negative self-talk can ever be completely distinguished...we are conditioned to be critical of ourselves and others. However, we can make it quieter and less frequent.

The laundry is folded and put away!

I strengthened my relationship with God today.

I am so lucky to be getting an education. I can study harder next time.

I really enjoyed that pasta. I can make up for it tomorrow at the gym. 

Luckily, I happen to be married to the most positive/optimistic man I have ever met. It helps a lot to have someone who will celebrate your little triumphs, go to the gym with you at 5am, appreciate the clean kitchen and folded laundry...I am so lucky to have such a supportive person to help me on my quest for self improvement for the rest of my life. Single ladies-add it to your list, it is invaluable in a spouse.

 

My Not-So Resolutions

just another post about the new year

One thing that I learned in the last last year was that the mentality of New Year Resolutions is a set-up for failure: the idea that you set goals only at the first of the year is bogus. 

Last year, I set all my goals on January 1-one for each month of the year. It seemed reasonable, even attainable, however, I didn't anticipate the changes that would occur within me over time. When March rolled around the goals that had seemed perfect for me seemed irrelevant and, with that, my resolutions were out the window. 

When fall semester started, I realized what had happened and tried something new: each Sunday I would sit down and set one or two weekly goals (relating to my larger long term goals). I checked in throughout the week to ensure progress and to make sure I was on track. I had more success with this method in the last 4 months than I have in 15+ years of resolutions. With my week-by-week system, my goals were able to evolve with me.

With that being said...

I believe in having big dreams and, with them, big goals.

I love new beginnings and clean slates.

I hope that I am not coming across preachy or self-righteous, that is not my intent. I just wish that I would have figured this out sooner, and to be honest, I am proud of my little system. 

I wish everyone the best of luck in their New Year's endeavors! Let's make 2013 a year to remember!

Then&Now

Yesterday I was writing in my journal and I started thinking about where Chris and I were this time last year. It was amazing to me how far we have come! I just wanted to share two things that have improved in the last year.

-In late November, I hit my heaviest weight. I had no self-esteem and no motivation to fix it. I remember only wanting to wear yoga pants and a big sweatshirt and wearing that as much as I could get away with it. I would never go to the gym on my own...Chris would have to drag me with him. Even if he got me there, I didn't really work out. I'd walk on the treadmill and pretend to do some crunches or something, and then go bug Chris about 30 minutes later to leave. I wanted big changes, but I wasn't willing to do any sort of real work to make it happen.

Now, the number on the scale hasn't gone down as drastically as I would like, but my attitude is 100% different. I prefer to go to the gym on my own, for some reason, that's when I can work the hardest. I have fitness goals that I am actually working towards. I asked for workout clothes for my birthday and for Christmas. I'm not looking for a quick fix, I want a lifestyle change!

-Chris and I were unemployed for our 1st semester married. It was rough. I remember that we decided that we wouldn't really exchange gifts, get a tree, or do anything that would cost extra money for Christmas. I am grateful that we went through that. It helps us to be grateful for our jobs and our complete financial independence.  

We now own both our cars and pay for our own insurance. We pay for my cell phone. We both have jobs we really enjoy. We are able to save money! I am really looking forward to giving the gifts I have planned for Chris!

It is fun to look back and see big changes and improvements. It is good motivation for me to have 2013 be a more drastic difference than 2012 is. 

Love Always, Monday

Mondays are hard. Let's be honest, we've all whined about it on Facebook.
I always felt picked on by Mondays, getting back into the weekly routine always felt like a slap in the face. Normally, my peak productivity kicks in about Wednesday-Thursdayish....just in time for the weekend to roll around and get me all out-of-whack again.
October 22 was nothing special- I went to the gym, worked, and did assignments. I was deliriously happy....and strangely productive.
I realized that I had made an accidental attitude change. I had been less than pleased with the past few weeks; I was excited to have a clean slate....a new week to be successful. I was driven by an obsession to improve and make this week better. 
I realized today that I had made it to the gym every morning this week at 5ish am.

Proof

(Ok, it's more like 5:30--but I wake up at 5!)

I made some diet changes and actually stuck to them and our apartment always seemed to be clean. Monday made a difference.

Snow didn't even phase me, I was secretly excited.

The cherry on top of my week? Hearing Chris express how proud of me he is.

Life is good!

Side Note: Anytime Fitness is great! I highly recommend it if you're looking for a gym membership.

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes

I've made some (more) changes to the blog.
1. As most of you probably know, I started a health & fitness blog in February of 2012. Honestly, I loved it. I loved having one place for all of my health related thoughts and endeavors to go. However, I couldn't find the balance between both blogs; one was always neglected and it was, for some reason, stressful. Even though I'm not a huge blog with a billion followers I really really enjoy blogging; and I love that there are some people out there that read what I have to say. I want to continue to write about my health, but its not the only thing going on in my life. As I started to make some progress, I found that my health was directly affecting all other aspects of my life. When I was working out consistently, I was doing better in school and was happier at home. I was more productive and tried harder to make my nonfitness goals a reality as well. So, I'm going to try merging the two; after all, this is a lifestyle blog....which means I can write about whatever I want. I loved all of the guest posts that happened there, so you'll now find them here. Also, if you're interested in my inspirations, I've also moved them here.
2. If you noticed, I've also stopped posting about 12 [in] 2012....but I haven't stopped working towards my goals. I realized about 4 months into the year that I was progressing and improving...and the goals that I had set at the beginning of the year weren't as applicable as I'd thought. I decided to make weekly goals instead, so my progress can evolve at its own pace. I am mostly telling you this so you won't think I'm a loser and have totally given up.

Here's to finding balance in my life!